If you thought flying was all champagne and peanuts, well, think again. From unexpected hygiene horrors to baffling culinary requests, cabin crew encounters expose airborne oddities that would make you question the altitude of basic human logic.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seatbelt and secure your sense of utter disbelief.”

Here are eight shocking things passengers actually do, ground or inflight, that have left even the most charming cabin crew reaching for the interphone.

1. The Barefoot Brigade

This act normally starts innocently enough: a passenger slips off their shoes during a long-haul flight (come to think of it, it can be any flight), then they start doing a pitta-patter down the aisle barefoot. Barefoot! Into the lavatory.

Perhaps you’ve even some propping up those feet on the bulkhead wall as if it were a yoga studio. Mind you, those bulk head seats are normally reserved for mothers with infants. Crying babies where?

Did we mention the floor isn’t as clean as it looks? Pro tip: if it’s not your house, keep your socks on please. I’m trying to save your life.

2. Trash Mid-Chew, Please

Forget waiting until the end of the meal. Some passengers seem to believe the tray table doubles as a bin, a disposal system mid-chew. Orange peels, used tea bags, snack bags bought from duty free, and everything short of a banana plantation gets handed to the crew with a mouth still full. Bonus points for the ones who tuck tissues into the butter dish.

Pro tip: it’s much simpler to give the tray back the way it was handed over to you, otherwise it won’t fit inside the meal cart. Cabin crew will love you for that.

3. Diaper Down the Drain

Yes, this actually happens, I kid you not. Used diapers shoved into airplane lavatories as if the high-pressure vacuum is a miracle incinerator, or some magic portal that makes things disappear.

Spoiler alert: it’s neither of those two. This results in clogged systems, delayed flights, and a very awkward maintenance report. Flushing diapers at 40,000 feet is not only unsanitary, it’s sabotage. Why? Because now the aircraft has one less lavatory to use, which equals to longer queuing on other lavatories and you, yes you, will be queuing too. Hopefully not flush another diaper.

Pro tip: aircraft engineers and cleaners, cabin crew and other passengers, pilots… Practically everyone thinks you’re crazy. Please read the signs inside the lavatory. There is a bin for that diaper.

4. “Take My Vomit, Please”

Once in a while, lovely angels AKA passengers will hand cabin crew a box of chocolate, candy and a note thanking them for a wonderful flight. On the other hand, crew have been handed many things mid-flight. From drinks orders, passports, emotional baggage, existential crises, but nothing quite prepares you for a passenger offering a bag of vomit like it’s a cup of hot chocolate on a cold winter. Often times, it comes with no warning and one would reach their hand, assuming it’s simply trash.

Nope.

Just a mysterious squelch and a hopeful look. It’s not a part of the uniform job description, but somehow… it ends up there.

Pro tip: think Biohazard. Even your doctor would have to wear protective clothing to handle that. Come on now, think hepatitis, gastroenteritis… Norovirus is very contagious pipo.

5. Dirty Diaper Hand-Off

If the lavatory trash bin is full, some parents get creative. Unfortunately, this creativity sometimes involves handing the crew a warm, used diaper wrapped like a sad sandwich. And no, it’s not a gift. Once, it was even left on the crew jump-seat. No warning. No note. Just a tiny, smelly act of aviation anarchy.

Pro tip: think Norovirus.

6. Vomit in the Sink

Because what’s the best place to redecorate in an airborne metal tube? Apparently, the sink. Never mind that it’s designed for water and clear liquids and never a digested sushi.

What follows is a clogged sink, blocked lavatory, a furious maintenance team, and one very nauseated passenger who thought it was better than the air sickness bag.

Pro tip: there is a sick bag for that, and a bin, and a vacuum, all in the same room.

7. “Can I Have Some?”

Believe it or not, passengers have eyed a crew member’s personal, home-cooked meal and asked, “That looks good! Can I try that?” One even reached for the fork. Sorry my dear, for this isn’t a food tasting. That’s my lunch, not a buffet line.

Pro tip: Yep. Don’t do it if you didn’t see it in the menu.

8. Mount Everest on a Tray Table

Some passengers don’t just eat. They construct. Layers of half-eaten meat, stacked cups, wet wipes, empty condiment packs, serviettes, unopened bread rolls, and a salad salad they bought from dutyfree that no one touched, neatly (or not) arranged like a culinary Jenga tower. All of it eventually slides toward the crew in a delicate balancing act of “Here, take my mess.”

Often times, the jenga tower will be handed just about the time crew have sat down to have their meals. A wrapper in one hand, a chicken drumstick in the other, and an urgent request from a passenger to dispose off both, while crew is still chewing. It’s performance art at best! Peak multitasking! Michelin-star manners meets garbage fire timing. Bravo!

Is there even a pro tip here?

Final Descent: What Does It All Mean?

Flying brings out the best in people and the bewildering. Maybe it’s the altitude. Maybe it’s the recycled pressurized air. Or maybe some people just leave their manners at the boarding gate. Cabin crew are trained to smile through anything, but even they occasionally stare at a situation and think, “Surely this isn’t part of the job.”

So the next time you fly, remember: behind every calm, smiling flight attendant is someone silently praying you don’t flush a diaper or hand them a bag of lunch-laced barf.

Fly safe our wonderful passengers, and please wear your shoes.